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Want to Know How to Stop Being a Doormat? Set Boundaries

September 23, 2022

portrait of a stylish blonde woman in elegant totall beige look leather trench coat, ring, and smoky eyes makeup in the studio. Spring - autumn fashion concept. Soft selective focus.

High achieving women are often praised for their ability to juggle it all and never have to worry about how to stop being a doormat. They have successful careers, active social lives, and thriving personal relationships. But what these women often have in common is their ability to set strong boundaries. In other words, they know when to say “no.”

Saying “no” doesn’t make you a bad friend or a bad colleague. In fact, it actually makes you stronger. When you set boundaries, you are saying that you respect yourself and your time. You are also saying that you are not afraid to stand up for yourself. Here are three reasons why setting boundaries makes you stronger and is foundational in your self development:

You’ll Have More Time for the Things You Want to Do


If you don’t set boundaries, you’ll quickly find yourself overwhelmed with obligations. You might feel like you can’t say “no” because you don’t want to let people down. But the truth is, if you’re always saying “yes,” you’re only setting yourself up for disappointment. By learning to say “no,” you’ll be able to focus on the things that are truly important to you.

You’ll Be Less Stressed


It’s impossible to please everyone all the time. When you try to do too much, something is bound to suffer—usually your mental and emotional health. If you’re constantly worrying about letting people down, you’re going to end up feeling stressed out and burnt out. But when you set boundaries, you’ll be able to relax and enjoy your life more.


People Will Respect You More


When you set boundaries with people, they will learn to respect your time and your opinions. This is especially true in professional relationships. If you’re always available and always willing to do whatever someone asks of you, they’ll take advantage of that. But if you start saying “no” more often, people will learn to respect your time and energy—and they’ll be more likely to treat you as an equal instead of a doormat.

Now that we’ve highlighted how boundaries gets you out of being seen as a doormat, let’s take a look at why setting boundaries is an absolute necessity.

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Types of Boundaries 

There are two types of boundaries: personal and situational. Personal boundaries are those that you set with yourself in order to take care of your physical and mental health. Situational boundaries are those that you set with others in order to protect yourself emotionally. It is important to have both types of boundaries in order to have a healthy and balanced life. 

Why Boundaries Are Important 

Boundaries are important because they help you maintain a sense of self-respect and dignity. They also help you stay focused on your goals and prevent you from getting sidetracked by other people’s problems. When you have strong boundaries, you are less likely to tolerate unhealthy or disrespectful behavior from others. Finally, boundaries help you build healthier relationships because they foster mutual respect. 

How to Set Boundaries 

The first step in setting a boundary is identifying what your needs are. Once you know what your needs are, you can start communicating your expectations to others. It is important to be assertive but respectful when communicating your boundaries to others. Remember, you have a right to say no even if it might upset someone else. The most important thing is that you stay true to yourself and do what is best for you. 

Fashionable portrait of a stylish blonde woman in elegant totall beige look leather trench coat and smoky eyes makeup in the studio. Spring - autumn fashion concept. Soft selective focus.

The next time someone asks for your help or your opinion, take a step back and consider whether or not it’s something that you really want to do or something that would benefit your career or personal life in some way. If it’s not something that falls into one of those categories, then politely decline and focus on taking care of yourself first and foremost. Remember, setting boundaries isn’t selfish—it’s actually a sign of strength and foundational in your self development journey.

The Duchess Academy is the perfect finishing school for high achieving women who want to get ahead in their personal relationships, careers and social lives. With our unique curriculum and white glove service, you’ll be able to elevate your lifestyle and elegantly stand out from the crowd. Join today!

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